transformational

"I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed by this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is good and acceptable and perfect."

(Romans 12:1-2)

And as I continue to read on in Romans 12, there is statement upon statement of what it actually looks like to be a True Christian. 

What is my joy and what is my spiritual worship and what makes me a Christian? They should all be one in the same. Technically speaking. But if I do not currently "rejoice in hope" or am not "patient in tribulation" or "constant in prayer"... then something's not right, as a Christian. There's always something 'not right', though isn't there? Because of the fall of man we're all so imperfectly human. But! That is why Paul makes such a direct and clear point of pleading for us to not be conformed to this world, because it's way too easy to do that. It's our natural inclination, because we are in this world. However, God has enabled us to actually be spiritually transformed by Him. Into what He has said mandates the marks of a True Christian. 

I don't have the ability to transform myself into a more lovely woman after God's heart. I can seek Him, but I cannot transform myself. My yucky, selfish, unmotivated, disbelieving, blind self. To be actually transformed into a Christian (day after day) requires supernatural power, which is only available through the Holy Spirit. So Paul says to present yourself as a living sacrifice to God. Just present yourself. That is all. Be ready for Him. Be available for the Holy Spirit to transform you. 

I want to be able to rejoice in hope, to be patient in tribulation, to be constant in prayer, to live in harmony with one another, to let love be genuine, to weep with those who weep, to feed my enemy. But I truly cannnot at this point. Sometimes, when I'm having a really awesome day, I can. But days like today, when I'm kinda sleepy, my muscles are sore, and I feel overwhelmed by what it means to be a Christian... I cannot. 

So I'll present myself as a living sacrifice today. And I'll do it tomorrow, and the tomorrow after that. This isn't a one day deal. I won't be transformed once and then WAM BAM I'm suddenly a super-Christ-follower. No, every day I have to do this. Spend time in quiet, breathing deeply as a prayer, offering up my heart to the Lord as I meditate on His word, asking for Him to uproot the parts of me that have conformed to the world (show me what they are) and then asking him to transform, re-make, cleanse, and strengthen me into a child of God after His dear heart.